Some themes from the movie, The Descendants

I was in the mood to see a movie today. It’s something that rarely happens because I usually don’t have the patience to sit through a movie. I remember seeing the previews for “The Descendant’s,” and I decided to treat myself to a Sunday matinee.  George Clooney is in it and he’s good scenery so I cuddled up in my chair with a bag of popcorn and a diet coke.  Really the only think I knew about the movie was that George Clooney was in it and it was more of a drama than a comedy.

 If you want a step by step replay of the movie, look it up on Wikipedia. I’m gonna mention some major themes that I felt were important.

As I drove home from the theater, I was thinking about the relationships of the main characters. The family basically was caught up in the everyday grind of life and pretty much took each other for granted. The husband, wife and two kids had several conflicts working within the family unit.  Then, the mother was in a boating accident and was hospitalized.  She remained in a coma for most of the movie, leaving her husband, Matt King (Clooney’s character) to tell his two daughters about their mother.  The oldest daughter knew her mother had an affair and there was conflict between them.  Words had been exchanged and Alex, the daughter, took for granted that her mom would always be around.  It was a lesson in forgiveness and also in goodbyes.

Another theme was a cross between forgiveness and revenge.  If you found out your spouse had cheated on you would you want revenge? I think most people would, but not King.  Instead, he decided to find his wife’s lover in an effort to give him a chance to say goodbye to her.

There are some smaller themes throughout the movie, as well, including the role of money in family dynamics.  From the beginning of the movie, there were references to stereotypes, which was another reoccurring theme. 

I thought it was a thought provoking movie, worth the two hours.  I was surprised at the amount of vulgarity used during the movie. If you are easily offended by profanity, I would recommend skipping this movie.

Thumbs down for Indiana and the "Right to Work"

I’ve never really cared for politics. I don’t really get wrapped up in the actions of the Indiana State house, nor do I follow federal decisions unless I happen to catch a snippet on the morning news.

Most of the time I figure that there isn’t much that I can do about the decisions being made, so I tend not to spend my time trying to figure out why Mitch Daniels or Obama do what they do.

But I’m sad to say that tomorrow Indiana will probably become labeled as a “Right to Work” state.

Although the title sounds good and I do believe that everyone should have the right to work, that isn’t exactly what is going to happen. At least that is how I am interpreting it.

Of all of the states in the U.S., 38 states have rejected “Right To Work” Legislation. There’s probably a good reason for that! The states that have enacted the law have turned out to be the highest in the nation as far as unemployment is concerned and tend to have lower wages, lower family income, higher rates for uninsured and higher poverty rates. Way to go Indiana… like we don’t have it bad enough already!

I’ve heard on the news that Mitch Daniels is pushing for the “Right to Work” because he believes it will create jobs and increase the economic well-being of the state. I’m not sure I follow this logic. To me, Indiana already has a choice for employees, particularly in the area of construction.

If businesses want to move into the area, they can hire union workers or they can hire non-union workers. Workers can choose whether or not they want to join the union or not. They can choose whether or not to pay union dues or not.

It seems to me that the “Right To Work” Legislation will only hurt Indiana workers and their families. And what frustrates me the most is that many Indiana families probably don’t even know that the vote is coming and that this will probably pass.

As I stated before, I typically have my head in the sand on political issues. But if this passes the Indiana House and Senate, several of my friends and family members will see a decrease in wages and more than likely safety. Union workers are promised good wages, good benefits, increased safety measures and the ability to retire respectably.

For Dan, Todd, my Uncle Tom and many other hard workers in this state, I hope that Indiana votes against the Right to Work Law.

The Real World...

I watched a couple episodes of The Real World from seasons in Washington DC and New Orleans this weekend. I am always interested in the sociology of meshing people from various backgrounds and experiences together in the same living quarters. I’m a fan of Big Brother and Survivor, too. It’s a situation I would never be able to survive!

For those of you who may not be aware of the story line for The Real World, there are typically about eight cast members between the ages 18-25 who are picked to live in a house together and have their lives taped. The show has been running on MTV since 1992.

As many of you might imagine, throwing a group of strangers in a house together often includes many of them hooking up, many of them pursuing their dreams of being in the spotlight and often several verbal altercations. I find the show rather entertaining.

But this weekend, as I watched the episodes, I couldn’t help but wonder when it was that I stopped thinking I could do anything I wanted to do. I watched this group of housemates pursuing all the dreams they had and it made me think. I remember in high school I was interested in photography and wasn’t at all shy about talking to other professional photographers and thinking that I could work for any newspaper or magazine that I wanted. I just went for it. In college, I wanted to work for the newspaper and I did. I wanted to write and I did.

I watched the cast member, Callie, pursue her dreams of being a photographer while in Washington DC. She didn’t know what she was doing, but was willing to learn and not be deterred.

Another cast member, Andrew, wanted to draw cartoons for the Washington Post. He called and got an appointment with one of the editors and talked about what he needed to do to get published. Although he didn’t get published in the Post, he was published in the Washington Times. Again, nothing seemed impossible.

I started asking myself, what’s changed? Maybe it’s age.  Maybe it’s money. I guess when I was in college everything wasn’t about money. I wasn’t paying the mortgage, so it didn’t matter if I was being paid a little or a lot to do what I wanted to do.

Maybe it’s geography…I don’t want to move to follow my dreams. Then again, dreams…. I think I stopped dreaming about the possibilities that life holds when I got a “real” job! I just float through life because I’m content. The bills are paid, I have good friends where I work and I like my job.

I guess this blog has been a little rambling, but I can’t help but wonder…

Does anyone else feel like this? Unsure of when we hit reality and stopped thinking about all the things we could possibly do?   

At times it was as if I was competing on The Amazing Race…

As my friend Brenda and I ran through the airport in Jacksonville, Florida yesterday, I felt for a moment like we were competing on the reality TV show, The Amazing Race. If there were teams behind us, we would have smoked ‘em.

It was 10:22 when we checked in at the airport and asked the lady at the counter if there was any way we could take an earlier flight than our 4:40.  We had gotten off the cruise ship and had nowhere else to go so we hoped to fly standby on the 1 something flight. On the computer, she pulled up a flight that would leave at 10:52 and proceeded to tell us that we would never make it. We asked if we could try anyway. After all, we had nothing to lose.

We checked our bags and began finding our way to Gate C2. We were on our way, optimistic we would make it. Until we hit security. Hmm…. Too many people in front of us, our passports were in hand and my tennis shoes were unlaced. But we weren’t moving. Seconds ticked away and suddenly our hopes were crumbling. And then, with a stroke of genius and a bit of luck, Brenda asked if we could cut. Again, we were off and running through the terminal with my tennis shoes in my hands! We got to the gate just as the last person was getting on. Sweet victory!

Instead of going through our original connection in Nashville, we ended up in Philadelphia. Neither one of us had ever been there and thought it would be alright if we had to hang out there for awhile. We got out at E11 and talked to the gate agent. She said we were just in time to make the next flight if we hurried to E9. We ran over there to once again walk on the flight that was boarding. What luck!

We made it, but our bags didn’t.  Instead of getting home at our originally anticipated time of 10:30ish, we made it to Midway at about 2pm. We had no idea if our bags were on the flight that would come in at 4:30 or the flight that would come in after. Luckily, they were on the first flight and we were back in South Bend by 8pm.

If we had been on the show, we surely would have taken first place and been awarded some type of Travelocity trip to some exotic region. Instead, we weren’t awarded anything except that anticipation of another trip in two weeks to Charleston.

I have to say that during the Carnival Cruise to the Bahamas there were at least two other times I thought our actions resembled The Amazing Race.

If you have ever been on a cruise (maybe it’s just carnival?) you know that they take pictures all the time around the ship and then post them in a gallery for all to see. You walk from wall to wall with thousands of pictures trying to find yours to purchase.  Well, as Brenda and I were searching for our pictures, I thought that it would be a great challenge on the show to show the contestants a picture of two people and make them find the ten pictures throughout the gallery resembling the people. I should be a reality show challenge creator!

The other time was in Nassau when we were trying to find some places to eat with local food rather than the tourist type of food. We asked a lady in the store where we could go and she had a thick accent and some broken English. We got bits and pieces. Finally, we asked someone else who said to take the number ten bus to the fish fry and look for the restaurants. Better yet, we took a cab and asked him and he mentioned they eat at Fish Fry, which we later found out is an area of restaurants, and Twin Brothers is the best. It was a bit of a challenge and also reminded me of the show.

We had a great, quick vacation on the boat and with plenty of fun in the casinos and the different ports. If I ever make it back to the Bahamas I’m looking for the stand by Atlantis, located just off of the ferry boat where the lady made us a drink called Goombay Smash. Probably the best frozen cocktail I’ve had in awhile!

For now, we’ve not been eliminated from the race. We may not have won first place, but we’ve got another few vacations to look forward to. I’m lucky to have friends who like to travel.

My thoughts on the movie, Courageous

In the last six months I’ve seen the movies Water for Elephants and The Help, both movies were suggested by my friend Brenda. Both were good movies, well worth my time and money.

Today, I suggested we see the movie, Courageous. As the movie scrolled through the credits, Brenda and I agreed that I am banned from picking movies for awhile. It wasn’t worth the time or the money, in my opinion.

It was my understanding that the movie was about four police officers who were working toward finding a balance between work and home life. It sounded like a somewhat interesting plot, and I always appreciate the good scenery of men in uniform.

The writers introduce four officers and their family situations. All were typical representations of today’s family units, a family of four with a wife, husband, young son and daughter. Another was a single dad who hadn’t yet met his 4-year-old daughter because he was running from the responsibility of being a father. The third man had a wife and three kids and was new to the department, trying to fit in with his new partners. Finally, the last was a divorced husband who saw his young son every other weekend and was struggling to survive paying child support and his own bills.

As I relaxed in my chair, popcorn in hand, I watched as the story line unfolded as the one officer was faced with the death of his 9-year-old daughter. The death brought led him to question what type of father he had been to his daughter, what type of husband he was to his wife and the role model he was for his son. In his time of sorrow he turned to God for help.

Over the next hour and a half the men decided to write a resolution proclaiming their wishes to be honorable men and honorable leaders in their homes. Here’s where I had an “issue” with the movie!

The writers went a little overboard drawing direct conclusions between each man and his quest to acknowledge God in his life. Don’t get me wrong, I believe in God and I understand the need for religion, but a little Bible lesson goes a long way. The repetitiveness of their message that God makes all possible was overkill. I was thinking that this two hour movie was the equivalent of six months of Sunday sermons. For a moment I flashed back to the bad after school specials that I hadn’t seen since I was in third grade.

I won’t go into more detail about the various sub plots in the movie for those of you who may still want to see the movie and make your own decision about whether the amount of God references was too much.  I’m curious to know what others think about the movie.

As for me, I believe the overall message of including God in one’s life and being a positive mentor for others is a great message. I just wish the writers would have illustrated the lesson rather than beating me over the head with it.

"But...it's tradition"

I spent a few hours on Monday driving slightly left of the center line. Nope, it wasn’t because I had over indulged in alcoholic beverages or because the alignment was off in my car. Instead, it has become a tradition it seems on holidays. I was in a parade.

As I drove down the road, I not only thought about the people in the parade, but also the people watching the parade. I wondered how many of them spend every Labor Day at the Blueberry Festival or participating in the parade.

What makes something a tradition? Is it the family and friends that add to the event? Is it the repetition that once you have done something it then becomes a tradition the next time you do it?

My nephew Sam is eight-years-old and he has a fantastic memory. Since he was a very little boy he would remember things that we did as a family and each year after when he would visit LaPorte he would refer to the traditions we had. My dad would pack a cooler on the boat with ice cubes and popsicles and Sam knew that along the ride he could have a popsicle and throw the ice cubes in the water. Apparently this was great fun for him and it has become a tradition.

There are a few traditions I remember from my childhood. Looking back, it’s kind of a shame that as my brother got married and had children of his own, they have kind of ended. Christmas Eve was always a huge night of tradition in my family. We’d have a really nice dinner and then go to church and miraculously while we were gone, Santa would make his way into the basement and leave presents under the tree. My parents would watch Kel and I open them and play with our new toys for hours.  I’d line up my Strawberry Shortcake figures and he would line up his Star Wars men. I have great memories because those times were what Christmas always meant to me.

As I think of other traditions like how we spend the Fourth of July, I wonder if our traditions were focused solely on holidays. Hmmm….

I’m sure they weren’t, but I’ll have to ask my brother and my parents about some of the others.

I know that at least for Sam, they aren’t. But I know each family has their own set of traditions and they don’t seem to be culturally or necessarily geographically based.  What traditions do you remember? What traditions are you starting on your own or with your family?

A walk to remember...

I went for a two mile walk tonight and by most standards, I didn’t blaze any trails. Yet, I think it was one of my more successful walks.

Last month I signed up for a half marathon walk in Savannah, Georgia on November 5^th.  I did it for mostly selfish reasons because I felt I needed a healthy goal to strive toward. So tonight, I knew I needed to walk, but I had been out with friends and didn’t really feel like going.

But on my walk, I was thinking about how the 13 mile walk in Savannah would go. It isn’t my first time walking 13 miles, nor my second, so I kind of know what to expect. Except this walk is a little different because I walked the others to raise funds for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. 

So as I walked, I enjoyed the thoughts of who this walk could honor. What will give me the push in miles 8 and 9 when I feel my thighs tingle a little? And that is when I thought about Destinee Smith, my Aunt Pammie, Jody Ryan, Brady Burkhart, Joe Agostino and Carol VanBraune and all of the other courageous cancer survivors I have met over the years.

I know many of you are probably tired of hearing about the importance of blood donation and what I do for a living, but volunteering for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society is something I started many years before I set foot in South Bend Medical Foundation.

When I was in high school I worked in the kitchen for LaPorte Hospital. I was a junior in high school when I met my very best friends for the next several years, Michelle Reese and Jody Ryan. It wasn’t long after I met Jody that she was diagnosed with Non-Hodgkin’s Lymphoma. Her struggle was so courageous that I don’t think she’ll ever really know how much respect and admiration Reese and I had for her. And her fight paid off and I am glad to say she overcame cancer. And because of her, it was shortly after I started college that I became interested in volunteering for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society.

It was then that I met Carol VanBraune and Joe Agostino. Carol was in remission and Joe had recently undergone treatment for his cancer. I can’t tell you how impressive their attitudes were to me.

About 10 years later, I started at the Foundation and I am honored to be able to know the cancer survivors who have benefited from units of blood and platelets such as Destinee Smith and Brady Burkhart.

So tonight, on my walk, when I wondered what could push me on my 13 mile walk, I thought of these people. Of how they sat for hours on end getting chemo treatments and how much I’ve learned from each of their stories. Talk about perseverance and determination!

So as I walk in Savannah on November 5^th, I’m proud to say that I won’t be walking alone, but with those who have walked in much bigger shoes than I will and I’ll know how lucky I am.